Life is full of decisions, most are fun, some are gut-wrenching
It was a little more than a year ago when I decided to test out my entrepreneurship skills and start my own business.
I was sitting at my desk at the Yukon Review talking with my co-worker Hayden Tucker.
We were discussing different jobs and goals in life when the idea was tossed around about starting my own newspaper in my hometown of Jenks.
Hayden looked at me and said, “Kyle, I will go with you if you want to do it.”
Eight months later, Hayden and I welcomed our inaugural edition of the Jenks Tribune. Both of us had tears in our eyes the first time we laid eyes on it. The countless hours and amount of energy and effort it took for two guys to do something like this all sank in at that one moment and all of it made sense.
Now, we are another eight months down the road, and nothing makes sense. This country is entrenched in a war against an indivisible enemy.
COVID-19 has taken this world and turned it completely upside down. On top of killing thousands of people, it is killing the nation’s economy and in turn killing the local economy.
All small-business owners are being forced to make tough decisions and for me, I just had to make the toughest decision of all.
On the night of April 12, I had to look Hayden in the eye and tell him, I couldn’t pay him anymore after May 15.
Eight months prior, that was the last thing on my mind. I envisioned us being partners in this company for a long time.
As I was going through the numbers, I was exhausting all my options and when I realized I had no choice, my heart sank into my stomach and to be honest, I am not sure it has come out yet.
I wasn’t just going to have to tell my employee that I couldn’t keep him, I was going to have to tell that to my friend, the one I always call my younger brother.
Hayden and I had a long talk that night of April 12. He handled it well. We had a good conversation. We sat there for hours talking about old times and revisited some old stories from our days together in Yukon and Mustang.
I sat there thinking to myself, trying to come up with any way that we could make this work, but it wasn’t there and facing that harsh reality is what has kept me waking up several times every night since April 12.
Hayden is a talented and skilled young man. He has a great future ahead of him with whatever he decides to do, but it is hard to imagine doing this without him.
I keep thinking to myself that this is just a bad dream and we are all going to wake up soon and everything will be normal, but that is not reality.
The reality is, life is full of decisions, most are fun, some are gut-wrenching. This one tore my heart out.